Savage Love

Dear Dan: My partner is 31 years older than I am. I know the math: He’ll be 60 when I’m 29. But that isn’t the problem. The issue is he’s been a lifelong bachelor and never been monogamous. He’s fucked hundreds of women and is close friends with a lot of his former ...

Dear Dan: I’m a straight 18-year-old girl, and I have been dating my boyfriend for eight months. He recently told me that he wishes we never had sex because he feels like he raped himself by doing it. He has had some bad sexual experiences in the past, but he has ...

Dear Dan: I’m a 27-year-old straight guy, and I’ve been in a monogamous relationship with an awesome girl for four years. Our sex life is pretty open and healthy, although it has lost some steam since the first couple of years — but that’s normal, right? For the last...

Dear Dan: I’m a bit out of your usual demographic, age-wise (I’m 70), but I am still an avid reader. (This is true, not a Penthouse letter.) My cousin and I have flirted and joked about getting it on together for about 50 years or more. Now she’s divorced and having ...

Dear Dan: I’ve been dating this guy for almost two months. It’s been pretty good, except the sex isn’t really the best. I have this other male friend who has had a crush on me. Long story short: My friend made a move on me the other night. I told him I couldn’t, and ...

Dear Dan: You may not be the right person to answer this, but your commenters might be able to help. I love and support my friends who are transgender, but I don’t understand all the 18- to 21-year-olds among my friends who are declaring themselves “gender-neutral.” ...

Dear Dan: I’m 25, I’m virgin, and I find it quite difficult to relate with girls. My main problem is I can’t accept my sexuality. I’m into fetish SM. But it seems like there are two parts of me. The first part of me wants to lick women’s feet and be humiliated. The ...

Dear Dan: I’m a 34-year-old straight female. I am morbidly obese and have been for most of my life. I have never dated. I’ve been on a couple of dates, and only when I asked the guy out. From reading your columns and books, I am aware that some men are attracted to...

Dear Dan: I’m the bisexual everyone loves to hate because I want to be in a poly relationship with both a man and a woman. I am a woman who is into commitment, loyalty, love, trust and honesty. I am not looking to cheat on anyone. %u2028But I discovered after one ...

Dear Dan: My boyfriend and I have been together three years. We plan to start a family, we are very happy together, we go on many adventures together — all that good stuff. For the past year or so, I feel like I’ve been losing my sex drive. Not just toward him ...

Dear Dan: I’m a short guy and I need advice. I don’t want a small paragraph’s worth of advice, like you gave “Below Their League” a few years ago. I need advice beyond “Women like men taller than them, get over it!” I get it. I’m short (5-foot-2), and most women are ...

I’ve found them after he hides them in his closet, which also serves as a general storage area. After discussions with him, I’m certain that wearing them is a pleasure thing for him. (He says “curiosity,” but this has been going on so long that he knows what it feels...