Savage Love

Dear Dan: Settle this for us, Dan? Which is the bigger ask: a one-time, once-in-a-lifetime threesome or regular (and pretty damn elaborate) bondage sessions...

Dear Dan: I’m a foot-fetish guy who split up with my girlfriend of four years. She was into all the foot stuff, and we got into lots of other kinks. My concern is about meeting new women. I’m worried I’m not going to be able to perform for vanilla sex. I feel almost ...

Dear Dan: I’m a straight 20-yearold woman in a relationship with a straight 30-year-old male. We have been dating for a year and living together for seven months. There is a lot of love but there has also been a lot of arguing. Our conflicts stem from issues of abuse...

Dear Dan: My question is one of etiquette. My lesbian wife and I live in an apartment. The noise pollution between flats can be pretty bad. Anyone who lives in the building is aware of this, and keeping noise down after certain hours is a common courtesy. I wouldn’t ...

Dear Dan: I think my husband is addicted to porn. I find porn in his browser history almost every single day. He says I’m the only one he wants, but I find that hard to believe knowing he watches nonstop porn before fucking me. He also parties every time he goes on a...

We just did a live taping of the Savage Lovecast at Seattle’s Neptune Theatre. Audience members submitted more questions — anonymously, on index cards — than we could possibly answer during the Q&A segment of the show. So I’m answering some of the questions we didn’t...

Dear Dan: Shame on you for recommending adultery as a solution to a husband who can’t satisfy his wife! Satisfying a woman is easy! I learned it from a book! You just tickle the clitoris continuously with as light a touch as possible until she comes, as many times as...

Dear Dan: I’m a lesbian who has been pretty successful at online dating. Lately, however, I’ve had a few women contact me who turn out not to be cisgender. I’ve tried to remain open, but I have never been attracted to a trans woman. I don’t rule out the possibility ...

Dear Dan: I have been wearing bras and panties with...

Dear Dan: I’m a 30-year-old straight woman, and I’ve been with my male partner for four years. Here’s the thing that’s been bugging me: After four years, the sex has gotten predictable. But it’s also gotten better in the sense that I orgasm a much greater percentage ...

Dear Dan: Straight female with a question. It’s about something that sometimes happens to me that I’ve never really told anyone about because it’s so weird and gross. It involves my bowel movements, so it’s not very sexy. (No offense to scat lovers, but I have zero ...