Savage Love

Dear Dan: I’m a straight guy, married for 16 years, kids in school. My wife cannot find a way to be intimate with me. We’ve had therapy individually and together. I nearly divorced her, but we decided to stay together — we do love each other, and the economics and ...

Dear Dan: My son is 15 going on 16, and he’s been experimenting with masturbation. At the moment, I pretty much just think fine, whatever, he’s a teenager, there’s very little I can do about it. So long as he doesn’t get porn-obsessed and start letting his grades ...

My boyfriend of three months, “Marcus,” told me last week that he is a trans man. He’s performed oral sex on me and fingered me, but he never let me reciprocate and told me he didn’t want to have penis-in-vagina sex yet because that was a large commitment. We go to ...

Dear Dan: Yesterday, I found my 5-year-old son putting things up his butt in the bath. This isn’t the first time — and it’s not just a “Hey! There’s a hole here! Let’s put things in there!” kind of thing. The little dude was rocking quite the stiffy while he did it. ...

Dear Dan: Here’s the Reader’s Digest Condensed Version: I’m a sexually inactive (by my own choice) heterosexual female in my late 40s who up until recently used to be much heavier and in rapidly declining health. Since my type 2 diabetes diagnosis, I have achieved ...

Dear Dan: I think someone asked you a question about me and my amazing Boyfriend. I set up and re-rack the weights when we work out. The person who wrote saw me kneel and tie my Boyfriend’s shoe and was wondering what was up. You told the guy to ask my Boyfriend. He ...

Dear Dan: I am a man who tends to ejaculate prematurely. Not all the time — but at least 50 percent of the time, I’m good for two to three minutes and then I REALLY have to be careful. I’ve learned to manage it and work around it (like, stop if I’m too close and eat ...

Dear Dan: I am a young gay man who has been so freaked out by the idea of catching an STI that I haven’t gotten with anyone for two years. But last night, I hooked up with a cute 21-year-old FTM trans boy, and maybe because it was a person with lady parts, I let ...

Dear Dan: I am a male grad student who is technically engaged to a female grad student. She has numerous positive qualities, but she is repulsed by sex. She is very sensitive about her repulsion and becomes distraught when I broach the subject. She says that even the...

Dear Dan: I’m a straight male kinkster who used to do live performances as a rope bondage top, but I recently jumped out of the kink community. I just think I’ll have better luck finding a long-term relationship with a girl from the vanilla world. So long as she’s ...

Dear Dan: We have a new shorthand term for BDSM doms who are abusive assholes: Ghomeshi doms. Good guys into BDSM should stick this in their online profiles: “I’m a nice, non-Ghomeshi dom looking for a lady who is into...

Dear Dan: Shame on you for recommending adultery as a solution to a husband who can’t satisfy his wife! Satisfying a woman is easy! I learned it from a book! You just tickle the clitoris continuously with as light a touch as possible until she comes, as many times as...