Savage Love

Dear Dan: I love my wife, but I have a lot of resentment, disappointment and insecurity over our sex life. After four years of...

Dear Dan: I’m a gay man in my late 20s, and I can’t get fucked. I have tried to train my ass, but the largest thing I can place inside remains a small butt plug. If I try anything bigger, the pain is unbearable. I’ve always been a very anxious person, and it’s clear ...

Dear Dan: I’m a single gay male in my 40s. I have a good life and do good work. I’m not worried about finding...

Dear Dan: I’m a 27-year-old, feminist, conventionally attractive, straightish, GGG woman. Over time, my tastes have changed, and now I find myself more of...

Dear Dan: I’m a lesbian who has been pretty successful at online dating. Lately, however, I’ve had a few women contact me who turn out not to be cisgender. I’ve tried to remain open, but I have never been attracted to a trans woman. I don’t rule out the possibility ...

Dear Dan: I used to be a fan of your column, Dan, but something happened to you. Maybe it’s stress, the current political climate,...

Dear Dan: I’m a middle-aged homo trying to figure out Grindr. Is it impolite to go on Grindr if you’re not looking for an...

Dear Dan: Two years ago, I found a letter in my sister’s car informing her that the blood she gave during a charity blood drive had tested positive for HIV. I didn’t say anything to her at the time, because it was a really bad time, I wasn’t supposed to find out, and...

Dear Dan: I recently ended a relationship that lasted a year and five months. While I loved this woman, for much of the relationship she was, to varying degrees, depressed. I tried to be as helpful and patient as possible with the hope and expectation that she would ...

Dear Dan: I’ve been in an on-again, off-again relationship for the past four years. My girlfriend has an assortment of mental-health issues — anxiety,...

Dear Dan: The sitch: Tend bar with a hot girl who has a boyfriend. Hit on her anyway because I’m that guy. She says I can fuck her but only if her boyfriend gets to watch and eat her out after. I don’t want anything to do with that scene. I was down for some ...

Dear Dan: My girlfriend can’t use hormonal birth control and “doesn’t like” condoms but wants sex. What would you do? — Paternal Anxiety Upsetting Sexual Escapades...