Screen
Inappropriate arachnid adjective
Ugh. Because there’s no way for me to do this that isn’t personal, I may as well go all out...
Going gaga for Kojo
Writer/director Blitz Bazawule’s first feature-length film feels exactly like someone telling you about a dream they had. Only you’re actually interested in it, and...
Indecent bro-posal
That’s My Boy isn’t just so bad that you would rather play a fun game of “scratch my retina with chicken wire” for 90 minutes, it’s so bad that writer David Caspe and director Sean Anders should be legally prosecuted for crimes against humanity. If this is what we’re...
Hard not to Laika
"Show your work.”
That statement is both an admonition given by rigid mathematics instructors and part of the reason why stop-motion animation continues to captivate....
Savage beauty and the beasts
They should hand out oxygen tanks before each screening of Beasts of the Southern Wild because writer/director Benh Zeitlin’s debut feature film takes your breath in the very first scene and plays keep away with it for more than 90 minutes. When people kvetch about ...
Black humorless
Low-brow. Just expect it from Gulliver’s Travels. When Gulliver ( Jack Black) first arrives at the kingdom of Lilliput and puts out a raging fire by dropping his shorts and urinating, I was astonished by the audience laughter. This is a film unabashedly aimed at teen...
The terror of St. Valentine
Let´s face a simple fact about Valentine’s Day: there are fewer things less romantic than being forced to be romantic along with the rest of the world. Instead of crowded restaurants and run-of-the-mill flower bouquets, forget the Hallmark holiday spirit this year ...
All robots hate you
As a milky-white gross-beast skitters its way around a wheat field, getting murder-death all over gun-toting space colonists, the only question becomes whether Alien:...
Through the looking glass
Lewis Carroll’s immortal story Alice in Wonderland has been brought to the big screen many times, notably 1951’s animated Disney classic. That’s an intimidating challenge, especially for Tim Burton, who generally tackles new stories that can be crafted in his own ...
Restless leg syndrome
Feel free to call director Steven Soderbergh’s latest film (and potentially last, if you believe his retirement threats) a wacky mallard because it is one odd duck. If a Hitchcock movie took a Dateline NBC segment behind the art house theater and got it pregnant, ...
I can’t believe they went hare
Here we go again, yet another CGI-animated children’s movie about the tyranny of unspoken, stereotypical racial beliefs that also acts as a metaphor for...

















