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REST IN PEACE...

Dear Dan: My boyfriend of two years cannot climax or maintain an erection unless his testicles are handled, squeezed, pulled, or pressed on (preferably with my stockinged foot or knee). Needless to say, intercourse does not work very well, and our sexual repertoire ...

ARIES March 21-April 19: You seem primed to act like a ram, the astrological creature associated with your sign. I swear you have that look in your eyes: the steely gaze that tells me you’re about to take a very direct approach to smashing the obstacles in your way. ...

ARIES March 21-April 19...

ARIES March 21-April 19: “A man may fulfill the object of his existence by asking a question he cannot answer, and attempting a task he cannot achieve,” mused 19th-century author Oliver Wendell Holmes, Sr. Advice that wild could just as well have been dispensed by ...

Dear Dan: I’m the bisexual everyone loves to hate because I want to be in a poly relationship with both a man and a woman. I am a woman who is into commitment, loyalty, love, trust and honesty. I am not looking to cheat on anyone. %u2028But I discovered after one ...

Dear Dan: My partner is 31 years older than I am. I know the math: He’ll be 60 when I’m 29. But that isn’t the problem. The issue is he’s been a lifelong bachelor and never been monogamous. He’s fucked hundreds of women and is close friends with a lot of his former ...

ARIES March 21-April 19: The 19th-century Italian composer Gioachino Rossini was a prolific creator who produced 39 operas. Renowned for his lyrical melodies, he was sometimes referred to as the “Italian Mozart.” So confident was he in his abilities that he bragged ...

The issue of public nudity sure has Deputy Mayor Ken Wilson’s panties in a twist. He’s so concerned about the evolution of the proposed public nudity ordinance — the one intended to punish naked pumpkin runners and nude bike riders without requiring them to register ...

Spies, lies and GPS...

Read the quote below very carefully. It was part of a statement released Monday by CU in response to Ward Churchill losing his court appeal to get his teaching job back at the university...

Dear Dan: I’m a short guy and I need advice. I don’t want a small paragraph’s worth of advice, like you gave “Below Their League” a few years ago. I need advice beyond “Women like men taller than them, get over it!” I get it. I’m short (5-foot-2), and most women are ...