Charlie Sheen begs to return to ‘Two and a Half Men,’ says his sobriety is ‘off and on’

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NEW YORK — So far, CBS has been largely willing to forgive Charlie Sheen’s many legal and personal transgressions, but on Monday, he gave the network more reason to worry.

During a highly erratic interview on “The Dan
Patrick Show,” the star, who’s currently on hiatus from “Two and a Half
Men” so that he can undergo rehab, announced that he was ready to get
back to work, though he also admitted that his sobriety has been “off
and on.” He even suggested to the syndicated radio show that he’d
already returned to the set, and was “banging on the stage door” but no
one would let him back in. Asked when he was scheduled to return, he
replied, “August of 2014 at this pace.”

Sheen also addressed his recent outburst during his surprise appearance at UCLA’s
baseball practice last week. (He’d told the team to “Stay off the
crack. Drink a chocolate milk.”) There were “rumors that I’ve had
problems with crack, so it just came out of me like poetry. … (I)
said stay off the crack, and I still think that’s pretty good advice,
unless you can manage it socially, Dan. If you can manage it socially,
then go for it, but not a lot of people can.” Patrick asked Sheen if he
thought he could handle crack. “Yeah yeah,” he responded, “but that
kind of blew up in my face. Like an exploding crack pipe.”

Sheen maintained that he was “100 percent” clean,
but his tone sounded desperate, making pleas to the network to take him
back soon. “I heal really quickly but I also unravel pretty quickly,”
he said. “So get me right now, guys.”

CBS declined to comment on the interview.

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