People who blow off Halloween as a kids’ holiday are doing it wrong. A celebration of darkness, madness and, most of all, excess, All Hallows Eve is as much about swinging from the rafters as it is about going from door to door. And isn’t getting a little sloshed always more fun when everyone’s dressed like monsters and cartoon characters?
But if you’re going to take on a new identity this Halloween, don’t ruin it by swilling an inappropriate drink. Sure, there’s something charming about a mummy holding a Miller Lite or a fairy-tale princess pounding Jager. Then again, the right drink can tie your whole costume together, and will help you stay in character throughout your creepy revelry. So here are some drink pairings that will take your outfit to the next level.
Vampire: If you’re going the fashionable route — either some ruffly Transylvanian aristocrat or a vinyl-wrapped goth — stick with red wine. The woozy and playful drunk will make you feel more like a predatory sexpot. If you’re thinking punk rock, a la The Lost Boys or Preacher, stick to blood-colored beers. Killian’s Irish Red or Founders Red’s Rye IPA are both good all-night reds to sate your unholy thirst.
Witch/Wizard: You want it to look as though you’re sipping a magical potion, so for starters, anything with dry ice smoke billowing out of it will do. Other than that, colorful and potent cocktails work best, maybe with a fake eyeball or spider tossed in for effect. Absinthe drinks are especially great — strong, green, known for the magical visions they inspire. A good porter or stout, black as the Sabbath, also works if you prefer beer.
Zombie: If the answer isn’t obvious, your dad didn’t tell you the joke enough times. Zombies drink zombies, or any rum-heavy cocktail in a tiki head, as a slight nod to the monster’s Haitian history. Those more inclined towards George A. Romero’s modern flesh-eaters should drink anything colored a toxic waste green, such as Jell-O shots and Midori sours. Corpse Revivers are also a fun referential cocktail.
Werewolf: Usually, a werewolf costume involves flannel — the ol’ hunter-whogot-bitten-and-didn’t-think-anything-of-it routine. Stick to the kind of beer one would keep in a hunting blind cooler — Old Milwaukee or Schlitz should do it — along with the occasional swig from a hunting flask. True lycanthropes, though, will rock the glass jar of Midnight Moon moonshine; the apple pie flavor is nicely seasonal.
Superhero: Whether you’re a knight in shining armor or a caped crusader, you want everyone to see your unrivaled strength. For light drinking, try a big frosty mug filled with a crisp, poundable Pilsner, and do beer curls throughout the party. As for liquor, no mixers or shakers allowed — you’ll do neat shots and lots of them! Whiskey and vodka are traditional, though if you really want to amaze those fine citizens, gin is hardcore.
Villain: When your life involves misrule and megalomania, you want to seem diabolical and clinical while still able to take the hard stuff. Get yourself a neat scotch — include ice if you’re going full Bond villain — and smolder over it as you seek your next unwitting victim or muse over your diabolical plans for world domination. If you want to go supervillain, shoot something spicy — jalapeño-infused vodka seems fitting — to show that you’re not afraid of the Hell you’ll end up in.
“Sexy” costume: Instead of matching drinks with a “sexy” costume variation, maybe just try wearing something else.
Devil: Thanks to the idea of Old Scratch as a “bad businessman” — think Robert Johnson — it always looks best when the Devil has a martini. Classy but strong as hell, a martini succinctly says, “Man’s ruin.”
Slasher: Like the hero, the slasher is unstoppable, stalking their prey no matter what. As such, go big, but do it in a grimy way. No mugs or steins — haul a growler around. Drink forties. Sure, it’s intense, but if you’re going to be a deathless murder machine, you better act like one.
